why?

because i. long story. haha.

but you can say that it's parallel to being religious without meaning--everything became a routine but not a ritual with meaning.

so to make karma points 0 is to empty myself and to start all over. it's not even about humility, but it could be about humility (not sure)

i kept thinking about how uow gave you a missed call. it obviously can not have happened without a reason. God really wanted me to hear what

he wanted you to tell me. guar. maybe.

and today the chinese dude called Fang told me what was the sermon about during his church service. it was about Jesus pre-Christmas.

they explored the prophecies in the Old Testament on Jesus' birth and the conclusion is that God will not give up on us because it's hard or

because we are unforgiveable. but he already demonstrates his love by having put so much effort and planning our redemption.

(that was to put it in a human sense)

bottomline: he loves us and will never leave us. it made me cry while waiting for the bus.

because i discovered that God has never been condemning me. it was myself all along. i had been the one holding back forgiveness for myself.

"you're all i want....you're all i ever needed...you're all i want...HELP ME KNOW YOU ARE THERE.."

oops. it's "help me know you are NEAR."

that sounds better =)

thanks for the sharing...i knew that u would be asking why I thank you...ur sharing had reminded me on self-condemnation...

yes, I never forgive myself all these while as well..in fact I hated myself so much.....

thank God for speaking to you =)

(that was to grace)

and thank God for you minghan =) onions and water. haha =)