and it turns out I DO NOT have ADHD

but I have like

how to phrase this without feeling like an asshole, this is going to be the challenge of my life now

I scored so high on nearly everything that the assessor was like what in the fuck and the only thing that I got right about my self-assessment is that my brain is spinning at a bazillion miles an hour at any given moment

but it's a feature not a bug??

she was like 'I would not want to go against you on jeopardy' which lmao

but I guess any attention/distraction issues come not from my inability to pay attention but from just like Finishing With Something and Moving On faster than is sensible or polite

I literally asked her, I'm like wait so am I the only struggling millennial in america who just genuinely needed to apply myself more in school

because I absolutely did not space out of chemistry and geometry because I knew the stuff already, I simply didn't want to learn it

and she's like HAHA MAYBE

so. joke's on me this whole time

anyway it's kind of funny. I'm sorry if it makes me an asshole, I feel like it kind of does sometimes. I don't even want to tell anyone the actual result because it feels shitty and neckbeardy

the results are in I'm god's favorite princess and the most interesting girl in the world

As someone with ADHD, this is hilarious actually (and imo not assholeish at all)

this is hilarious

tfw your attention and memory are both actually great with the caveat that you have to give a shit about what's being presented

my fucking Struggle

hamster wheel spinning intensifies

you have too many attention, it’s not your fault shit is just boring and tedious

TOO MANY

2 fast 2 furious

fuck this is why I concentrate better on things when I've been drinking a little (not enough to be Drunk or start a serious problem)

slow the fuck down

and then you yell NO and kick reality in the face with your ENERGY LEGS

You’re not an asshole. 💕✨ if you win jeopardy I’ll send you a card that says NICE

this is why I love you

I would not win jeopardy

do you want a card that says NICE anyway

I would slam the button and blurt out something incomprehensible that is not in the form of a question, and then I would walk away and off the soundstage and into the ocean

Hahahaha

yes I do actually. want a card

Okay

today is the first of what will become my GottaGoFastiversary

oh also the psych said they didn't find any confirmation of OCD but I was like. that's because I'm on prozac

you also didn't ask me any questions like 'do you ever think about the worst thing that could possibly happen and then you can't stop thinking about it'

but that also wasn't what we were screening for. so.

ur card will be in the mail tomorrow

I love it when people tell me "you don't seem like you have OCD" and I'm like oh good the plan worked

drugs have done their good work

god right

sorry should I be flipping more light switches or

oh man that’s wild and i’m impressed. ol fastbrain, fastest thought in the west. let’s do trivia night and you’re on my team

the plot thickens. saw my therapist yesterday and she thinks I got misdiagnosed

which like. maybe

in both cases I'm like idk man!! you're the doctor! but it is nice to think maybe my attention/sleep/whatever problems aren't just because I'm super amazing and choosing to be bad at some stuff because it's boring

the thought of which has not been doing my self-esteem any favors frankly

having all the indicators of ADHD but unlike people who have ADHD I personally just need to shape up

it's nice to learn that I'm smart, I have always been self-conscious about feeling stupid compared to my friends etc. but I also am very empirically bad at some shit that, according to the testing, I should be good at

idk. I'm tired

man. either way it does sound like this testing result is not helpful for like. fixing the actual struggles you are having.

frustrating!!

yeah lmao

congratulations you're neurotypical!! ok great. wh..what should I do about not being able to sleep

hello? hello??

Well you have ocd so you’re definitely not neurotypical

As a fellow OCD sufferer

And this shitty brain disease can fuck with your sleep

that is true