Ion know how to dm on here rip but

this crazy bitch bro

freshman year, right, I didn’t know this at the time but someone told me after everything went down and I gotta start with this bc like

its the start

this bitch went around telling people I didn’t speak English?????????

And no one thought to be like “I thought… you didn’t speak English” to me after??? Someone else told me

but anyways

we are 3 days into our college experience, classes have not begun and girlie pop begins to crush on this guy in our friend group

this is a Christian man, church twice a week type

and in a week, 7 days, since we have met this man she decides to confess to him

brother

he rejects her, says “I want me a Christian gurl who reads the Bible” she comes home cryingg

we live in a room together

she blasts Olivia Rodrigo’s sour all night long

The next morning comes around

I don’t know this until two days later

she starts fainting

just

fainting?

around him

Ends up passing out in his room, sleeps in his bed, he sleeps on his roommates bed?? His roommate on the floor

And eventually this happens when Im around and Im just like, girl?? Tf were going to the hospital

LMFAO MY PHONE DIED AND I FORGOT TO CONTINUE

Sorry sorry

Anyways at the hospital theyre like "we think ur faking but drink water ig" and we're all like fuck u cause what kinda hospital is this

Skip foward like a week, we're at home, my girl goes to turn off the closet light, turns it off, rather than walking to the bed girl jumps on it, misses the bed, hits the fucking wall, cracks her fucking eyebrow open

We end up having to go to the hospital at like 12am, they glue it shut, dont make it back till 3

We have a covid scare, so around 9 we head back to the hospital to grab tests, get in a fucking car crash, and still go through our day

Skip foward again cause we're not done

Maybe a week passes, mind you we haven't even been in school for a month yet

I throw our friend a suprise party for his birthday, she shows up starts acting dumb saying she cant remember how she got there yada yada

We all panic, rush her to the ER AGAIN

Theyre like "oh its a minor concussion"

We go home, next morning i gotta run around telling this mfs teachers that shes on fucking brain rest bc shes convinced shes gonna fucking fail

Shes inside all day, eventually shes like "i wanna go on a walk" im like whatever go crazy. She comes home, meets up with a friend in the same building as us

Says once again "i wanna go on a walk" this friend is just like ??? Shouldnt you be resting. Shes like whatever says shes going to the bathroom

Way too long has passed for a piss, like 5-10 mins, her location is on so I check, shes not here

Shes half a mile away. I tell our friend and her roommate, we go chasing after her, by that point shes a mile away

Walking mind you

We get to her she starts crying "oh I dont remember how i got here I dont remember how I got here"

I call her mother because fuck this shit take your daughter to the hospital yourself

She grabs her, takes her to the hospital, she comes back after a day "oh they said it was a brain bleed" Huh????

Okay whatever, skip foward, she starts forgetting people????

"I dont remember who you are" "idk you"

Except??? She doesnt do this when I'm the only one around

Spends 2 hours in our room, sees our friend in the hall, all of a sudden its "idk who they (ref to me) are"

Does this with multiple people too

I start getting suspicious

Bc shes fine at home till someone we know comes over

At some point she starts have a tourrettes flair up???

Except I dont know until a week latwr because as usual, not happening at home, only when we're around others

I start calling bullshit

Except i dont tell her this bc I still live with her

Instead I bring it up to the ones shes closest to in the friend group (her crush, and the girl who lives in our building)

And i bring it up casually, like not like an asshole but just "dont play into it too much, let her set herself up and proveherself wrong" essentially

She does

Numerous times

Including the time she caught herself saying my name, stopped herself mid name, and then said she couldnt remember me

Eventually, one of them sets up a meeting with like student services and brings it up to them

Bc this entire time shes really having us care for her

They eventually side with us and tell her shes either gotta leave for a semester voluntarily or get kicked out

She dips.

And now you might be thinking

"Oh my god junie b! What if she wasnt faking it and she just had a bad brain bleed/ concussion! What if she actually had tourettes! God your such a dick! Your not a doctor to be making those calls"

And I agree with you for about 2 months until the next sememster came around and she came back and apologized for making it all up.

She admitted... to making everything up

Anyways, i managed to convince them not to place her in my room again so 🤪✌️ that is where our roommate saga ends