I had two old guildies message me back to back

Wanting to catch up and ask when I might play again

One of them I haven't talked to in 2 years but we were really close at one point

The other I saw on my trip to Malaysia but haven't talked to since

The one I hadn't spoken to in 2 years was surprised I quit the game (it's been a year now) but also said, lol, he saw it coming

The way I was running things and the commitment I had to the guild for 4 years was enough to burn out the best of guild leaders

I know it sounds weird

But it's still really gratifying to know all the damn work I put into the community we built has paid off

And I know a lot of it is thanks to my successor but I'll happily take credit for the foundations I created with the team of officers I had at the time

We made the guild from the ground up, we built a solid reputation and one that's now lasted over 5 years, even without my leadership

I think the greatest thing you can do for a created community is to see it thrive without you. That all of the effort you put in has been enough to see it through into the next group

I'd never want to guild lead again in BDO, it's more work than any MMO I've played. Between PVP, Politics, grind spot skirmishes and just your typical assholes, it's exhausting and draining to the best of guild and community leaders

But it does make me miss these people fiercely and the community we built together

I'd log in if I wasn't scared of the risks that would have. People bombarding with messages or guildies begging me to take the reins back. Even if I rejoined my own guild, I would never want to take the lead from my successor and I know just being there would be a challenge to his authority that I don't want to upset

He had a super rocky start. Of the 6 officers I had, 3 of them peaced out when I left, assuming the guild would die with me

3 stayed. 2 of that original group are still around today, but others have come in and stepped up and filled in those gaps

I still have access to everything via discord, so I lurk constantly. At this point, I'm just a discord admin that swats out people who click suspicious links by accident, spam channels and need a temp ban lol

It's happened a few times and always in the middle of the night (which is my middle of the day) so I guess that's why they keep me lmao

In the lull I have between games, it's so tempting to return

But I feel like - I know this sounds strange - I would have to check with my successor before I did so. See what the boundaries are, the rules, if I could fit back in or if he'd prefer me to do a name change and keep a distance

I wouldn't be upset by any of it. I'd rather see the community thrive than bog it down because I chose to come back after "perma-quitting"

Anyways, getting those messages just catapulted me into a fog of nostalgia. It's nice to be there. I remember more good times than bad

I still remember the betrayals we had, but with every betrayal came a mighty vengeance and a satisfying conclusion

If I may go on a nostalgia tangent

That one betrayal we had in Node War, I'll never forget

An ally we had agreed to before the fight allied with another group

When the War began, they tried to say it was a mistake, that we weren't meant to be allies and they had someone else

But when we asked the opposing group, they said they were also allied with the same people who had screwed us

This group effectively allied to everyone and as a result, they 3 v 1 'd us and took the war

But our King of Gossip was friends with greater guilds

They pulled this stunt over and over again and then they pulled the same thing against one of these better guilds

They said they'd ally and then rug pulled and took them down with other allies that weren't pre-determined

And that better guild spoke with our Gossip King (really, he was just a vet pvper with friends still in bigger, older, stronger guilds) and they collaborated for revenge

That guild who betrayed us got hunted down into nonexistence

Everyone in that guild either quit, fled to another guild or name changed

Because they pulled the same shit on the wrong guild

The guild who hunted them down, I let them borrow some of our members for the hunt

All while giving the guild being hunted niceties and condolences for their troubles

I was pissed

You don't fuck with my kids and get away with it. We were the underdogs in that original fight. You didn't even need a 3v1

Ruining someone else's playtime on a more permanent scale after they screwed over ours, I don't feel even a millimeter of guilt for that. That's just BDO for you

And yet somehow I miss that lmao