on a positive side, boss promised me she will NOT do this again

I talked with people and expressed my worries and all and we'll see how it goes

I've been allowed to call the boss if she comes to work drunk but that would make the rest of my month HELL since it's not like we can swap around anything <

boss said the other keeps calling about how Amazing it is to work with me and I kind of stared to the boss and replies 'only because I do all she asks me' which isn't something I want to do anymore... so it's going to be awful

I already took 10 drops of benzodiazepines and will keep my bottle in my bag regardless, just in case

they make me sleepy but they're better than a panic attack

I am also going to tell her I'll do Guest X on my own since that guest is near death and I KNOW she gets aggressive with her

so pray she doesn't get that personally

AND I got cake (store bough because I'm too tense to actually make it this time) and I will tell her I made it and saved her some slices TRYING to put her in a good mood. I'm not good at lying but this is a necessity. food 'tributes' do seem to placate her a lil bit

there's a reason if EVERYONE didn't want to work with her and now that I spoke up it'll be interesting for sure