After encountering a menu that described their selection of milkshakes as "slurps" I have decided that if your menu uses cutesy verbs like "bites" and "sips" instead of, I don't know, entrees and beverages, we should be allowed to burn your restaurant to the ground.
SLURPS?
I can kind of deal with "bites" because I've seen it too many times, it dulls the pain, but
Yeah, my stomach turned.
slurps can die in a fucking fire
Also like it's never just some plain jane middle of the road place doing it, either. I wouldn't be thrilled with it, but I'd maybe kinda get it if you were trying to lean on being real fucking no pretensions local watering hole type of vibes.
I don't think I would mind bites for like, appetizers, but Absolutely Not re: slurps
But it's always some fucking ridiculously bougie upscale of a working class cuisine that does it.
Like Braydon, you're charging me thirty dollars for a cheeseburger and not even giving me fries with it, for that price you can bust out the nouns.
If I'm going to pay 18 dollars for an Old Fashioned (that you're probably making with well whiskey and simple syrup) or some other alcoholic beverage can we at least acknowledge everyone ordering this is an adult and not call it a sip?
Unless you're serving it to me in a novelty cup that looks like this. 
a thirty dollar burger WITHOUT FRIES
I've seen it before. Never ordered it but I've seen it on menus before.
without fries? damn