I offer no insight about my capabilities

Go with your heart

probably not i'm weak

Eeeeeeh... I don't think I could win, exactly, but I think I could make fighting me sufficiently unpleasant enough that, even if you defeat me, ultimately you haven't achieved a victory, you know?

^ this one

It's like punching a blender: you might win, but you're probably still going to need some stitches.

nod nod

I have often proven that I can defeat you while we are fighting.

while the two of us are both involved in a fight.

I’ve met you. I have the advantage in terms of (I think) height and (definitely) weight. I like my chances.

yurisoldier: TECHNICALLY true

because you are a cowardly wretch who shoots people in the back

...thinking about it, it's kind of a shame you don't get to really play-wrassle with your friends anymore once you're past like ten or so. I don't want to hurt my friends, but just trying to wrangle someone like Steve Irwin for fun sounds nice.

I don't pay attention to which way you're facing, Eric

your back isn't special

Martial arts classes aren't the same, they have rules and dignity. I need to be at a sleepover where we have watched an inadvisable amount of WWE.

Probably not, I'm out of shape -__-

yurisoldier: That was a raw enough villain line that I actually googled it to see if you were quoting anime again, I hope you know that.

thank you

maybe not but I can take you on a date 😉

I'm pretty good at Mortal Kombat, so I say yes.

if the fight is with tanks

Holsety: I don't date sorry

SamuraiMarmoset: no there will be REAL blood not cg blood

askaboutourspecials: FISTICUFFS

probably not then

nah I'd still win

ok

;_;

i think i've got like a few inches and a hundred pounds on you. my martial arts skills are rusty but i can still arm-lock with the best of em

so unless you pulled some mean shit, i think i've got you mano-a-mano

yeah

absolutely not

you could be like 3 feet tall and 100 lbs soaking wet and i'd still lose

probably not but i could bruise your shins real bad

I am incredibly averse to hurting others, so no

I would slowly lure you into a love triangle and ambush you when your guard is down. I'm a pacifist, though, so it would be more like tagging you and saying "gotcha" and then I go back to my normal life.

BrmbleBush: I can think of an extremely key and obvious reason why that isn't going to work.

I am immune to charm attacks, sorry

but are you immune to farm attacks

/runs eric over with a tractor

I am now enriching the soil

Maybe I could take you... but not in a fight

Secret third option

You could take him... to Funkytown.

Dance-off time.

Take me out to a nice dinner