(a few days later, while putting plates back in the pantry)
Me: Sam! quick, come have a look! Is that what I think it is?
His dad: Yeah, a rice cooker. Why?
Me: YOU HAD A RICE COOKER THIS WHOLE TIME AND DIDN'T TELL ME!!!???
His dad: You didn't ask.🤷
Me: I just assumed you guys don't eat rice…well, obviously I was wrong.

Me: You're not gonna believe what I just found in the pantry. A RICE COOKER!!
Him: See? I told you, you should've asked Dad first.
Me: The hell was I supposed to know? I thought only Asian people eat rice.
Him: That's racist, you Ching Chong.

Me: Give me your hand. (place his hand on my tummy)
Him: (presses gently)
Me: Careful, you're gonna hurt the baby!
Him: Huh? (presses way harder til I almost throw up)
Me: (Urp ) Why are you doing this to me?!
Him: Not you—the baby.
Me:

Him You've gotta stop making these jokes, it really worries me.
Me: Who says I was joking?
Him: (punches my stomach)
Me: ITS JOKE! ITS JOKE!!

(Having lunch at the food court)
Me: (just about to start eating my beef pho)
Him: (almost done with his beef wrap) still a bit hungry, I'll get another hot dog over there. Do you want anything?
Me: But I haven't even finished my noodle soup yet and I don't think I'll have enough room for it after my noodles.
Him: There's always room for dessert.

10 minutes later...
Him: (shows up with a hot dog and two bags of doughnuts🍩)

hope it will arrive before Christmas