especially if he ends up fighting us on it (which is more and more as he gets more energetic, ironically enough)

just. whether it's his IV or having to syringe feed him, my brain just goes straight down into the dumps

and i find myself worrying about whether anything is working, or if he's ever gonna get back to the point of eating regularly again, or like... if any of this effort is making anything better for any of us

and then that takes me straight to just being like-- i wanna give up. on everything. i'm tired and stressed and the world sucks so like what am i supposed to do

i know, logically, that i've made the right choice for monster at least, but like. it's getting harder and harder to feel that way

when everything else sucks and i can barely even take care of myself

i really am trying hard to not think this way, but

/gestures at Everything

but it's hard

im sorry nerd

and idk if the weather has been exacerbating any of this, since honestly i like the rain but

idk

i just feel...... lost, i guess

it might be? it's been a LOT of rain even for oregon lately

darker days too

yeah

it's just. it's dark, and monster's sick, and i'm broke, and USA.....

yeah

/lies down =.=

im here ok? however i can help

ty daddy ;;

i just. don't know what could help rn aside from like. suddenly a couple million dollars falls in my lap, you know?

The world and life have not been kind lately. You haven't had a chance for a break either. The weather is also likely doing a bunch of small changes that add up like light, air pressure, humidity and forcing the body to adjust

yeah, i know...

sob