So definitely on Review for Termination with work, and existential crisis that comes with the usual "I have debt, I can't be without income" aside, I'm honestly not sure how I feel about it.

On the one hand it sure would be fucking great to find a job someplace and just stay there again

On the other hand, holy shit is this one going downhill fast

Plenty of process changes that add time to the work but not the handle times we need to meet, and the back-to-back management reshuffles have saddled me with a manager who 100% does not give a damn

Regularly ignored messages (and if I'm lucky I MIGHT get a response by the end of the shift that day instead of the next fucking day, or not at all), promises of support that never materialized...I genuinely hate even coming in now.

Because other than the assist line for specific things that pop up in a claim, I know I'm basically on my own

Like I had a monitor stop working this past Thursday and needed to get it replaced. So I asked him if I could just come in before my shift to swap it out or if they had to order them.

I asked that question seven separate times.

I never received a response.

Well, not from him anyway. Because I ended up going into the office and just working from there the next day so I could have working fucking screens, and got an answer(and monitor!) from a manager on a completely different team

He agreed my biggest struggle is with call control (since we can't interrupt, even if someone's off on an unrelated tangent). Said he would get me some side by sides to work on it.

That happened ONCE. For like an hour. On a slow day. Where all I ended up doing was withdrawing claims or transferring to the correct department. All quick, easy tasks.

So the actual problem is definitely never getting addressed

and in the meantime I just get to have repeated talks about my handle times still being too long, but fuck all is being done to actually help me with it

I'm so damn tired if this, and of the fact that nowadays the only time I've even got a CHANCE of getting a good night's sleep is Friday Night and Saturday night, because I know I don't have to show up the next day.

No amount of time (slept) or habit changes (like switching off the computer an hour or two before I actually go to sleep) help with this, so work is the only possible culprit that comes to mind.

Doesn't matter if I set aside ten hours, eight, or the usual 7 that's always worked for me, I will end up tossing and turning in a restless sleep.

(and usually, but not always, wake up every couple hours for no damn reason)