♪Musicoll♫
asks
have you ever drawn a line with family and they cross it anyway? 
last year it was my oldest brother. I no longer talk to him.
about six months ago, it was my mother. I no longer talk to her.
Now, its my other 2 brothers and my father. come tomorrow, I will be stopping all communication with my blood family.
IF THEY CROSS THE LINE I HAVE SET
Sorry, Coll, to hear about the problems you have with your family.
me too. some bday present.
today, I am starting to pack. Because if we don't move, I will not survive.
and with Michelle still sick, I am on my own with that.
Coll I am so sorry to hear the situation with your family is just not getting any better. 
I am just sad by the whole thing...
sorry to know this, Coll.
well, back to packing...... see you all soon, I hope. 
thinking of you Coll!!
Amarvel
says
i am so sorry that you're dealing with this. i can relate. i have similar relations with my "family". hang in there, dear.
Yes.
don't have much family and they live quite far away from here.
I absolutely refuse to speak with one of my sisters. Absolutely. She could expire right in front of me & I would not blink.
The attitude of my family these past weeks has been nothing short of horrendous.
My sister was selling my Mother's stuff on ebay even BEFORE I arrived.
I was (pardon the expression) really fucking pissed at that one.
wow
just wow, that is unbelievable.
Then, they go to lunch-I wasn't invited b/c well, Cheryl was there and after all, the house needed to be cleaned.
I can't believe that!
Then they all got on me b/c of the whale thing
And Daddy...hmmm...he tried his best to stay out of it
millions of squishy hugs for Cheryl 
Then, I try and take an alternate route and think that just b/c I am a certain way, I expect others to be the same.
It was a terrible experience...families are supposed to come together when a death happens...
Yet, I felt at odds constantly with my one sister
The tension could be felt
We love you as the wonderful person that you are, Cheryl! 
Your McNana fambly is always here for you.
Your McNana fambly is always here for you. *nods*
To be candid, it was "the Fambly" who kept me sane.
Cheryl
guess that is best forgotten and thankfully you have your memories of your mum to yourself. no one can take those away from you.
The best times I had were out on the deck at night with Daddy, drinking coffee while he smoked his cigar and we just talked
It was because he was carrying such grief and was just so sad, that I did not (God forgive me) punch my sister's lights out
that sound lovely Cheryl and perhaps that was reason to be there.
I left him silly notes all over the house for him to find. Hopefully they will cheer him up.
that's a beautiful thing to do 
My thought was that us kids didn't just lose Mummy, Daddy lost his bestest friend.
But then again, I am just an emo old lady and can very well understand Coll's situation
Coll and MIchelle deserve so much better. IMHO, they just want to "be" and do their own thing, not hurt anyone, and love one another
Nothing wrong with that.
Love Your Parents no matter what.
trust me. been there done that i can now say i love them both
you're not an emo old lady Cheryl and i think you're right, for what that's worth. and i think you did a lovely thing for your dad.
you know what you're talking about and also i hope you know we're here loving you to bits.
I just hope that things work out for Coll and Michelle. I really do.
yes! you and me and a few others too, I imagine.
Awww Coll and Cheryl
Sometimes drawing a line is needed to grow stronger. Sometimes family members need this to get respect for someone else
It does not mean this situation is an eternal one
I admire you and have a great respect for standing for yourself
beckysalljazzy
hopes
everything works out okay, Coll
beckysalljazzy
says
I am so glad that I have the parents I do
I thank them for it all of the time
it's amazing how much we can hurt each other, us people....
it's bad enough we manage it accidentally...
totally baffling when some people seem to do it on purpose.
mumzski
is
so very sorry for the pain your families cause you, Coll and Cheryl!
mumzski
thinks
you're both such lovely, loving people and you surely don't deserve to be treated so hatefully!
mumzski
is
glad you chose to let us love you and be your fambly.
*dittos Mumz' sentiment*
*nods*
is proud actually to call all of you fambly...
mumzski
thinks
this is a wonderful lovely fambly and is so thankful to be part of it.
mumzski
thinks
mebbe a hugglefest is called for yups
yups to all of that really!! and to the hugs too!!
I'm in!!!
Thanks to all of you. I end up coming here because you all make me feel better. Always in always
dillydally
is
wery glad to hear that!
I guess better said Always in all ways 
W/E Connie - I understand that point of view. My wife fixed her relationship with her very abusive father, in time for him to get dementia.
She is very happy she did it.
I tried the same thing for the last 10 years and it has come to this.
all I have been asking is a little basic respect. I give it all the time.
They can not provide that. And they are not the type of people I would hang out with.... so....
To me the regrets are happening anyway.
I was going to cancel my studio time, but I am not giving that power to them.
mumzski
is
glad you made that decision, Coll. And no one can tell you what is the "right thing" to do with your family....
you get to choose/change your boundaries however you want/need to do.
knows you don't do this lightly and that you have tried very hard for very long. *sigh*
mumz Coll!
I am very saddened by all this 
I just don't understand
I just don't understand
*nods*
you're grieving.
grieving the loss of the "perfect family," which, of course, doesn't exist.
I was not even going for great. Good. Nope. Good to others. Yes.
That is how my parents made me to be. Why are they not doing it anymore?
would like to ask them really.
would like to get 'em on my couch is what I'm sayin'. 
(therapy couch that is)
We did that when I was a teen. But I don't think they really opened up.
well it was just a fantasy really.
besides, my magic wand is broken and my easy button is out for repair.
Instead, when my parents left, the therapist stared at me for an hour without saying a word.
hard to lose family at the best of times, but glad you're choosing not to let them stop you from what you want to do
*nods*
Not what I thought I'd get for my bday. That is for sure. 
Michelle ended up getting really sick and I had a nice quiet evening with myself and a fine hot dog dinner. (que the pity face)
awwwww!
Michelle is very upset at herself. Which sort of makes it worse cause I love her.
bleh
*nods*
She is on 3 new meds. One of them has a side effect in 6% of cases that she had. So, she had to stop one.
*sigh*
She is still recovering.
This is all from the "new path" we are taking for Pain Management Clinic.
so far, we are back on the rough road towards her shingle problem.
mumzski
hopes
something starts helping soon!
me too! Something or someone has got to be able to help.
oh wow, like I said not the best of times huh. you're gonna find an upward road though Coll!!
*nods*
mumzski
wishes
I could actually help somehow.
yes.
I kept a website from nils and his acupuncturist that seem most promising in San Fransisco.
I will drive her down there as my last resort.
Which after this pain clinic stuff, it will be our only choice.
mumzski
thinks
that sounds like a worthwhile thing to try really!
mumzski
has
heard such good things about acupuncture!
Thank you Nils for that underlying comfort.
firm believer in acupuncture for all sorts of thingies and especially pain!!
We did acupuncture, acupressure, and other acu stuff. All made things worse. But this guy really seems to get it. IMHO
Would love to just be able to take her down now. But life is not allowing such ventures right now.
gonna have to love you and leave you so to speak, coz I need to crash, but thinking of you both Coll and sending lots of positive
vibes and thoughts and wishes your way. hope something comes along to brighten things up soon.
(wuvz)(wuvz)
♪Musicoll♫
loves
Sally
just sayin....
I have to go too. Lots of cleaning and packing to do. I will prolly be in Wednesday.
I will prolly be in Wednesday.
mumzski
will
keep praying for you'umz, Coll. Take care and don't forget we love you!
sleep well, Sally dear!
Amarvel
gives
much love & hugs to Coll & Michelle! it warms my heart how you all stick together. *this* is family. love you all!
it warms my heart how you all stick together. *this* is family. love you all!
mumzski
is
glad you're here with us angel.
Coll
Cheryl
Jamie=MiKa=小班
says
Coll,my English is not good,I dont know what happen....but...
HDSander
says
I try to catch up with this long plurk filled with wisdom, important touching information and love!
At least I'll add my two cents to the huggle fest
Cheryls_ Stuff
wonders
How Coll is doing today.
Coll told that he has studio time today, therefore I hope he is in good (musical) mood and doesn't think too much of the family problems.
*nods*