While in Falkreath minding my own business, I get accosted by three thugs intent on murdering me. Hilarity ensues as follows:

1. I run like hell towards the guards for help. The guards promptly ignore me or flee. I panic.

2. After a long battle/chase, I manage to bring down two. I killed the third right in the main street in front of an old woman. Said old woman looks at the corpse, at me (with bow in hand) and says:

"Someone did this!".

Cue stunned silence on my part.

3. After looting I get the name of who hired them and head out to her cabin to promptly murder her.

i now just realized I have yet to touch the DLC.

4. After a while, still in Falkreath, I get accosted by a courier which brings me a Jarl's invitation. Too bad it was Falkreath's jarl and I was standing ten paces from his house.

Hence, Falkreath is full of incompetent fuckwits.

And yes, I love this game to death.