The character I'm writing isn't a total transplant of me - I can still ask, 'In the mind of this character, what would she do given what her experiences are?'

But if the opportunity exists for her to hook up with a character that me the person wouldn't mind hooking up with [and] it wouldn't hurt the plot any...

Holy crap, who knew that NaNoWriMo and fanfic had so many ethical questions attached...and I've never Mary Sued anything, so I don't exactly know what the rules are there. XD