oh great sermons from a guy named david before we go to zombie planet
tlou flashbacks
this is fine
i probably read the calendar a hundred times in various stages of no.......
with my hands over my mouth
I don't know tlou enough what's happening here
you're so lucky..............
Ye... AH....
oh................................... lmfao
places comforting hand on ellie's shoulder.........
I WANNA KNOW....
there's just a really really creepy dude in tlou named david who ellie has something of an altercation with
"something of an altercation"
that's
incredible
i mean.................. i could go into detail......
oh god i am just so happy that i haven't gone through with canon updating her to the end of winter
oh god
stares into the abyss
ah... i didn't know your canon point was before that...
though it was my plan to wait about a year and then do it...
ah.......................
.........baby girl............ )':
yeah she's from the start of winter! when she and joel go to the mall and have a gay old time
lmfao my first time playing tlou.. i was a WRECK by the end of winter
ahhh ok
Yeah no that's why she's so happy and cute still
Protect my child
i don't know anyone who WASN'T a wreck by the end of winter .........
Satan
i could hardly play the battle with david, i was shaking so bad
i've been thinking that when i canon update her, i'll take her from the firefly lab
so just. casually showing up in a hospital gown i guess
it was remarkably similar to a recurring nightmare of mine so 
hella messed up about cannibals
HH HAHAHA...
I STILL WIG OUT DURING THAT FIGHT
Ah. Ellie...
it makes me so stressed out
that fight was so well-done honestly
the tension was so real
even when king is playing i'm just like
YEAH I GUESS... it's best to keep ellie in the dark about kaneki then
covering my face and yelling
omg... yeah same
and the scene after...
casually weeps for 400 years
ugh i get stressed just thinking about it YELLS I KNOW
b a b y g i r l
i need to replay tlou soon and kill my emotions all over again
same OTL
Masochists
i definitely am an emotional masochist but eh
it's still such a good game ;w;
opens this plurk
slams this plurk shut
shaking and crying
someday I'll play tlou... All I ever did was play through the intro, put the game down, and never return
tlou is a game for people who hate themselves and want to cry
that said- i love to live vicariously through people doing their first playthrough/watch
I can't actually play the game because the combat system frustrates me too much in high stress cuz I'm a weenie
but YouTube is a wonderful animal
omg you're not a weenie! it's very stressful!
I don't mind high stress at all... but I'm not very good at shooters aaaat all 
ummm- latitudes come give input, you'd never even played a shooter before tlou and you had a learning curve
slaps this plurk
slaps it so hard
it's a 3rd person shooter so the controls handle differently
it's going to take some time to get a hang of but there are lower difficulties so you don't have to worry so much
oh my god
it's more of a stealth game and less of a shooter tbph. there are a lot of enemies you can sneak around/stealth kill with a physical combo. i do extremely little shooting in my playthrus
besides going Katniss Vengeance Mode in the winter section... kill everyone with bow and arrow
I shoot almost no ome
I snap necks
CRACK
BR EAK THE M LI KE TW I GS
For those of you not aware resident dad is an excellent neck snapper
yeah i stealth and hit people with bricks
he is
with his powerful bear hands
i try to avoid shooting at all unless i can nail a headshot
^^^
BEAR HANDS
FUCK
I MEAN
but yeah i typically only choke people out and use bow and arrow
and just avoid clickers
THEY ARE REALLY EASY TO AVOID... WHEN THERE AREN'T RUNNERS AROUND
just... slowly walk around them... they'll be fine
Skills: experience in Microsoft Word, types 60wpm, proficient in neck snapping
oh but bloaters
fuck that
flamethrower
there's no way joel would type 60wpm
he hunts and pecks with those massive bear paws
^srry2say i agree
actually-
well
he was part of our generation
he and tess were probably all up on that shit
what year was the outbreak supposed to be again?
even if computers were more readily available i feel like joel wouldn't have the patience...
2013!
i don't remember seeing a computer in his house, but he had a playstation
nerd
nerd...
NERD
he probably played crash bandicoot
man i forgot that they were that close to our generation tho..
yeah cause joel was a young dad
the game takes place like- 20 years later
and he's in his 50sish
i mean i'm 26 so he had to be only a few years older than me in the outbreak
;~;
i assume youve seen the concept art for young joel tho
goddamn
♛ princess
thinks
way too hard about this
I leave to do things and come back to powerful bear hands
they are extremely powerful
anyway I like stealth a lot actually... stealth is my jam... ok maybe I'll pick up tlou remastered soon...
c:
good
Yes all of that stuff
pick it up its the best game ever
idk if I've seen the young Joel concept art actually
oh man
i cant find it on image search...
i might take a picture when i can get to my artbook at home
I think he was like 16 when he had Sarah personally...
Do it I wanna see
yeah he was.. super young..
I always figure between 16 and 18
Like every texan
lmao omg
yeah
But yeah 60 wpm I think he could manage
For sexting
omg
Eyebrow waggle
joel.............
when i show you this pic of young joel when i get to my house tho
Important headcanon about dick pics
he was a hot dad ok
The hottest
in tlou he's more of a foxy grandpa
Still is tho
without... actually being a grandpa
tru
Him and his foxy dad elliptical
LMFDLS
dick pics omg
He's not a pervert.....
Look there's a difference between asked for and unasked for dick pics
For instance my friends sis has a phone filled with dick pics from every boyfriend she ever had
Which????
ah now i feel bad because it's all blurry
i can take a better picture if necessary........
yyyyyyyooooooooo
he looks like the kind of guy who would go through a starbucks drivethru in his pickup and order a strawberry frapputhingy
LMFAO
I love how every naughty dog guy has stumpy legs
he looks like the kind of guy shinji would have a crush on laughs grossly
Shinji pls
what...he likes older guys with a bit of stubble 
ur an infant go back to kissing angels
hot dad
LMAOMGDSFAS
he is hot dad material
me: makes fun of my faves forever
don't be ageist
GO POOP IN YOUR DIAPER CHILD
RUDE
he's gonna be forever fourteen ok don't be a hater
poopy diaper pooper forever
Old salty lady...
yes
she's like a sea captain
omg...
hottie with a body
marchpane: slips in here... if you'd like you can hit that thread back one more time and i'll give you a tag to direct ellie to the log, or you can just hit up her open log prompt c. 
he works hard 4 the mone ok
*money
already on it slams hands on table
ur not getting away that easily vriska
omg ellie no
ellie pls
also congrats on 1000th comment on my inbox
Do I get a prize
makeouts
sloppy makeouts
W O W
Excuse me
Training wheels
the age when they're allowed to come off is 17
this is the official stance of team trash mom
wow that's no fun
sorry your mom is such a prude ellie
dang. Sorry about your mom indeed, Ellie.
shinji'll just have to have extra sloppy makeouts for you
Well in previous hinata based conversations training wheels only prevented threesomes so
then Ellie's good to go.
Unless Hibari gets involved.
Well since he is Vriska's boyfriend
He is, but trolls have quadrants and keep them separate.
WHY DO THESE THINGS HAPPEN
i look away for 2 seconds and sloppy makeouts
always sloppy makeouts
I take total no responsibility for this
I take complete responsibility for being a shameless shipper.
My question is
Who says they'd be sloppy
ELLIE YOU'RE GROUNDED.
...point, game, match.
Tess will provide you with an approved list of date options.
Tess, body pillows don't count.
The list is empty. On the bottom of the page it just says "definitely not vriska"
tess you're boning sad rat guy!!
Yes but he's pathetic and she can crush him!
Actually one name on the approved list
it's just like
Terra"
"but dont' get attached she'll probably die ngl"
Also don't you know the rule of adults, do as I say, not as I do
Because tess definitely shouldn't be dicking the guy with spoopy god powers
...thanks mom
Tess would just hand her a list of ppl who she thinks are 2 pathetic to try to kill her but that's also the list of people who will die so they're not safe either
Would shinji be on that list too?
Oh the list of pathetic people? Yeah probably.
Which
shows how wrong tess is
HA HA HA
pathetic, still might try to kill you
LMFAOMFDSG
more like shinji would murder anyone who even tried to hurt ellie at this point 
kaworu aside she's his closest friend... 
and first girl friend he's ever had...meaning friend that's a girl
not that he doesn't think ellie is cute but...yeah
gaaaaay
half gay
xenophille
...yeah
and extreme age difference 
HAHAHA
LMFLDSF
