Storyteller's Choice today?

what genres are available

i'm a fan of greek ladies tell us a greek lady story

I take requests from anywhere in the world.

But I can totally do Greek women.

Do you have a favorite Greek lady?

nope! too many good ones. storyteller's choice

OK, kind of a short one here, but it amuses me.

And this is kind of one of the beautiful, yet maddening things about Greek mythology, because for every myth you know, there are about six different alternate versions. This is one of those alternate myths.

Most of you know Eros as being the son of Aphrodite and (probably) Ares, right? WELL, TODAY YOU GET TO HEAR ABOUT A DIFFERENT VERSION.

Starring Penia, the goddess of Poverty.

Penia wasn't a super-popular goddess. Can't imagine why

Hades especially wasn't a big fan of her, since opposing forces, yay~

But either way, one day, she got invited to Aphrodite's birthday party.

Don't ask me how anyone knew when Dite's birthday was, or which one she was celebrating, because seriously, who the hell knows. But Penia was there.

Really, everyone was there because Aphrodite is a huge attention whore and there was a big feast to celebrate, and from across the way, Penia spotted Poros.

Now, Poros was a son of Metis (y'all remember her as Athena's mom, right?), and he was the god of Expediency. And probably kind of the black sheep of that particular branch of the family.

He was a mess, no shoes, didn't have a house to live in, but Penia saw him and was all, "Oh no he's hot"

So, when he staggered out into the garden, high as fuck on nectar, Penia followed him.

Poros didn't notice Penia, being so high and sleepy, so he just laid down to sleep it off. And Penia was all, "OMG THIS IS MY CHANCE!"

So, yep, while he was sleeping, Penia crept up to him, lay down beside him, and... totally took advantage of him. Because rape is an equal-opportunity crime, at least if you're a Greek deity.

Anyway, she conceived Eros that night. Aphrodite wasn't even mad because she was all, "LOL, GET IT GIRL, EVEN IF HE IS SMELLY AND WEIRD."

Now, it's worth noting, that in this version, Eros himself isn't the cute, cherubic prettyboy everyone imagines him to be normally.

No, following in the footsteps of his parents, he was forever poor and dirty without shoes or a house, rough around the edges, and always scheming against the fair and good, however much he liked them.

But also bold, enterprising and a good hunter, liked to create intrigues and drama, resourceful, never got a real job because he was always pursuing wisdom and philosophy.

Also he sucked at being actually wise or doing magic.

But there you go, Penia got herself a guy during Aphrodite's birthday bash. Woot.

poverty and expediency gave birth to erotic love?

IKR? Makes perfect sense.

...actually i can really depressingly see how that makes sense

It's also worth noting that this particular version of the birth of Eros comes to us from Plato, so...

GREEK PHILOSOPHY, ERRYBODY~ /jazzhands!

of course it was plato

now it makes sense

Doesn't it just?