I could point you to the game you joined but don't play at? Because I kind of have the gibe that you don't actually want to be there

And I'm kind of wondering what the deal is

*vibe

The game that I was just tagging around in before notifs went down? And was oing to tag back yesterday but killed myself on.

Like, yeah i'm struggling because to me it feels like you guys are upset with me. When I've made clear on my plurk that I'm constantly busy with a school thing and my computer flatlined.

I spend more time on my phone doing phonetags since I don't have a reliable computer.

But I mean when I'd ask for ideas/planning I didn't really get a response so I find time looking for people who have threads I don't feel I'd be a ttal waste in?

Like I would have totally plotted with you guys for the event but you had it settled by the time I saw it.

So I'm sorry if that's how it looks but I haven't had much to be entirely enthusiastic on and have been trying to find ways at my slow pace.

Okay so I'm going to need this "woe is me" routine cut in half

Nobody hates you, nobody's persecuting you, nobody's ignoring you

Yes you're busy. But you're also not the only busy person? And given that this larger conversation includes Debs and everything that goes on in her life, it's disrespectful as hell

So I'm going to break down what you're doing as it appears from the outside

You app. In the meanwhile, Kyr dissolves. You moan and moan and talk about how THERE CAN NEVER BE RP AGAIN

You start asking people about new games while you have an app outstanding

You vanish for a little while. That's cool, life happens sometimes.

You come back moaning about how EVERYTHING IS SO OVERWHELMING

The AC post goes up and at this point I consciously make a decision not to henpeck you about it because while the AC post is up you're online

You plurk frequently about GMW, behind the scenes stuff, and fandom issues

you don't notice that AC is up

This tells me that you had computer time available to you, you were active and engaged in the spaces that were important to you, and you didn't want to bother with the game

You finally notice AC after it closes. The AC mod is cool with things because you did post once. You say you're going to get better, like you're afraid of hurting our feelings or something

You make a plurk about the current event asking us to come to you to help you plot, even though we've been open to collaboration

There's no reason to think that Farkle can't walk up to anyone in Maya or Riley's CR circle and assume a tangential connection

The thing we're doing in the current post is a "teenagers get into trouble" group thread - on what planet wouldn't you have been welcome to join in if you'd asked?

I roleplay for collaboration. I don't want to write you a script and say "go here and do this thing"

If you're not feeling Eway, that's fine. But I wish you'd be more upfront about it

Because Farkle's a ghost and seeing that you joined another game in the meanwhile just makes me go "oh. :|"

tl;dr handle your shit and figure out what you want

We definitely do not hate you Kisa and I want to make sure I say that! Even the other day, I said I wasn't upset with things going on because I get life happens.

A little frustrated, admittedly! But not upset, because you had a busy month with school and then your computer imploding and that just happens sometimes and there's nothing anyone can do to control that.

You're definitely always welcome to just butt your head in and go I WANT TO DO THE THING too because I do want to do things with Farkle.

And I'm sorry if some of my short responses on AIM led to that impression, text is hard, and you caught me at a time I was AFKing a lot for my own life things. But I do want you to know that I want to do things

with you.

That said I don't think either side needs to be hostile and we can chill and talk things out and all get on the same page because I think that's probably something we need to do.

I'm not even trying to start anything? And I wish Jessie, you'd realize that it's not overwhelming and when I plurk about something it's not panic inducing. It's me thinking and theo nly reason I'd missed ac

because Ithought it was on the ooc thing for some reason which I realize is partly me not paying full attention to the IC comm.

But the reason I do have a small inkling of "am I doing something wrong?" is because it seems like I'm expected to constantly be up in your plurks? But the truth is I have been busy I have

been super not into rp as much as I was when I was Ryslig. But it feels like I'm supposed to be like that then? You guys both have told me you'd like to play but it'd be nice to get pinged? Because I might

flick something up but I'm not on plurk or dw all day every day anymore because I'm trying to separate myself from it a bit because I do get very clingy to it.

But if someone talks to me/pings me/etc I do respond. And that's where I fall because I don't see a plurk until a day later or something?

And I know Debs schedule and how its it but you don't even know how mine is? Or that my computer thing is real and I can perfectly well show you it's broken.

I'm not trying to sound upset, I'm explaining my side. Because it'd be nice if it wasn't assumed I'll be jumping into every convo and sometimes I need pings. (Which I doubt is actual assumption, but I know

I was more up in them in Ryslig)

That's my bad then and I'll own that, and something that I can easily change. So I do apologize for not pinging you because it wasn't my intention to leave you out in the slightest. :|a

I know you don't. And in spite of that I'm not even mad or anything. It just made me feel disheartened because I do want to play with you guys? But I'm sincerely taking a loto f time off the computer and w

what not and coming soon I'll be back in training and school and I'd rather not keep up my habit of being online everyday wanting to rp.

No, do what you have to do for you! We can work things out and this is why I think we needed to talk as a cast anyway.

Because I do realize that about me So that means I do miss things and it'd just be nice to pinged sometimes?? Sometimes I catch it, sometimes I don't.

So that way we could work out the kinks so everyone can be happy and we all know what's up and what we can do to help each other out.

And I will admit I was upset about Kyriakos and I know I was overdramatic at the time. And I get depressed! And upset and I thought "maybe I should get out of RP" for an entirely different reason than

Everyone being on the same page and knowing what's going on (even just "yeah farkle's holed up in the library" or "yeah riley's asking the closet for bunnies") helps a lot too for being busy 'cause I know

what it's like being busy.

Kyr dying. It was literally because I've been rping since I was 13. And again, I'll get obsessive about something I love. And I'm a lot more aware of my issues now and while I struggle it was a thought of

"this is a goodtime to quit" but I love RP so I've been trying to dose it.

kyuupin yeah and I'll always be happy to share that :c Like I tagged the lab thing just the other day. And I admit because I haven't been super there I'm having trouble getting footing.

And am still in a stage of "what can he do?"

I've considered finding theatrical outfits and have him run around trying to be pippin >>;;

Dosing it is pretty legit. :|b It's what I'm doing myself since I've been enjoying gardening and catching up on my steam library and everything-- oh do it! I bet there'd be people that would tag it.

I'm not even trying to sound unkind. I'm just trying to get myself to be different than before.

People in the game are super friendly and perfectly okay with people just tagging 'em randomly, like. I have a thread arguing about peanut butter and jelly rn

But yeah this is why I think we did need to talk just so that we're all on the same page with what's going on ICly since that's gonna be key with all of us being busy too and cuts back on bad feelings on all

sides of the thing.

Yeah. I'm just trying not to use RP as a crutch anymore and didn't feel any reason to air that to the public. Because there is a lot going on on my end right now. And avoiding it with "let

us rp" is a nono I'm trying to stop

Because I definitely support you doing what you gotta do for you.

I'm considering it! I think I will because he still always wants to be Pippin anywhere and I think that would be his takeaway on wonderland.

but yeees i tagged the pb&j one too and after some things with the school in a bit i'm going to return the few tags i have

Yes please ;; Because I have no trouble saying Farkle is doing X but I didn't think about it because I'm usually here all day every day.

And I'm not even denyin that I've been inactive and that the time I could be I've spent more time talking to the person I'm dating

But I'm more balanced now and want to get involved even if in a few weeks my schedule will be more lopsided. ;;

We'll work it out. :|b That way there's no more ehhhnnn feelings on either side and we can all have fun.

Like what I've been doing is saying "eh riley's out in the garden chasing bunnies and butterflies or painting purple cats" or something if I'm disappearing for a few days or not feeling it

or saying she got lost in the library because so many books

Well like -- my problem was never that you were BUSY. My problem was mostly that you kept saying that you were too busy for Eway while at the same time going "BUT ALL THE RP EVERYWHERE ELSE" and I was like "k."

but if that's not the case, then my bad for misunderstanding you?

and RE pings, do you have the Eway account on your timeline so you can at least know when things go up?

Debs can ping you for "hey there was a game announcement" stuff if she wants, but I still fall more on the side of "not your mother though?"

I was also just kind of worried that you were ONLY expecting to play with us

like... idk that feels weird to me, and it makes me worry that you felt like we were FORCING you to play somewhere that didn't make you happy

and like. SO not the case?

ALSO GOING BACK TEN YEARS because I THINK I forgot to mention a thing?

you were like "you expect me to show up in your plurks" and I don't think we mentioned that Eway is actually oldschool enough that people use the OOC plotting posts

like MOST of what was developed for this event (on my end at least) sprung from replying to plotting comments / reading other people's comments and letting them inspire me

so if you weren't checking that then maybe that's a thing to consider?

I actually haven't been rping period really? I have a psl I hit up when I'm talking to someone if I feel like it. But we do it when we feel like it and it usually aligns when I tag around EWA or find

posts that work for me.

I've been literally in no other RPs and aforestdark is a a slow sandbox thing not omething super duper time consuming. I hate tagging on my cellphone so I just sit and read fanfictions on tumblr so I run into

things! Like when AC went up I had been in game like 17~ days. That's two weeks. A month will be in two days. It's not been that long! Even though I do want to be active.

I'm a little upset at what you said though, because I think you'd know better from Ryslig that I tag literally everyone if I can find something to grasp onto and reach out for CR.

My thought process was never "I'm only playin for Jessie and Debs". What I WAS asking regarding that is there was plotting going on in plurks! And if people need me to verify where my character is or want to

do something I don't always find that on personal plurks? So a ping would be nice. That's all!

Somehow the Eway mod plurk skipped my mind at the time and I'll keep in mind people plot in the plot posts but

I've never said that I was there only to play with /you guys/ I wasn't there for that in Ryslig either.

Until last night I didn't have an actual plurk about any other rp than EWAY. I did ask if a driftfleeter might have an invitation to spare but had ultimately decided against it. Most of my rp plurks are

"let's do things" which encompasses all things. I considered putting an EWAY tag at the top but thought maybe an rp one was better.