my boss has had me looking for TV monitors to use on a project we're doing and apparently I've just been doing it all wrong so we are no closer to our goal than when I started.

I feel so dumb for making such stupid and simple mistakes.

So he tells me to get back to working on the server and IP camera thing I've been doing which he also made me feel very stupid about this morning (hence my earlier plurk)

so I've been doing THAT wrong too and I try to play it off like I've just been out of the game for a while and I need to refresh, haha stupid mistake, oops. But no it still fucking sucks. fuck today.

just let me go home.

I'm just scared that he's going to come to the realization that I'm not all I'm cracked up to be and he's going to see that I'm just a stupid useless fuck and he's going to fire me.

I NEED this job in order to afford shit, especially with my ex moving out and me still having close to a YEAR on the lease.

update: Boss came and apologized. I mean... I appreciate it, man, but I still feel like shit.

I know what you mean... I also feel incompetent at my job frequently and if I lose it I am in BIG trouble

:/ sorry we're in this boat.

At least I have a plan.... working my ass off and praying hard I get into nursing school... I need a real career... why didn't I listen to any of that good advice I got in high school?

(unfortunately) this kinda IS my real career, the start of it anyways. I mean, just based off the fact that I did this job in some small capacity in the Marine Corps.

a bunch of IT stuff... which isn't really even what I wanted to do in the first place. I want to fly planes. I can use my GI Bill to pay for/earn my pilots license but I need to get cracking on that.

That's awesome!

Good luck!

I sucked hard at self-motivation and actually getting shit done until I had a kid and it suddenly became way more important. And of course now I have much less time and energy

hopefully Bluegenius will be able to tolerate me long enough to keep helping me achieve my goals. She's already been doing a wonderful job.

"tolerate" you pfft

you