Lots of stress makes me really ill

That and I'm taking Sarah's death harder than I thought I would.

I cried about her so much in therapy today. I miss her. I wish I had been better to her.

I need to be better to everyone else now. I just... I guess I feel a bit overwhelmed with where to start. Plus with who to start with. After the shit with Ricky, it's still hard for me to just trust everyone

I trust you on here. I mean the people who are my friends here, but I just mean like other people

And I want to be better to you here too

I do try. I just... I'm sorry

I'm not even going to justify it. I'm just sorry

I want to do better

I'll talk to Katherine about this next week when I see her again.

One thing I've learned lately is "I'm sorry but...." is a really shitty apology. Sometimes, all you need is just "I'm sorry"

One that I can't stand is "I'm sorry if I offended you" I mean, like if I say something that I legit didn't know was offensive and I was like "OMG I'M SO SORRY!" I can see "I'm sorry if I offended you" being valid

But like, this one drama shit storm on YouTube I've been following, the girl was like "I'm not sorry for what I said, but I'm sorry if you were offended by it."

Bitch, you are sorry! Now apologize!

LMAO I'm going WAY off the point now, but I hope I can hold out until Friday. I may just take a sick day Friday and see if Mike can leave early for BoJack