last night i slept a grand total of...3 hours. from 6am-9am.

when i lay down, my esophagus is like "OH MY GOD THERE IS NO ROOM FOR AIR OR BREATHING OR ANYTHING"

the, uh...the sphincter (h-help) is both swollen and having a hard time closing, which means

a c i d r e f l u x

and i just can't swallow. like. can't. cannot. because i would be swallowing mostly air

but i'm trying to stay hydrated-- BUT MY THROAT IS CLOSING UP WHEN ANYTHING TRIES TO GO DOWN

and then when i drink, i salivate, and i have to find somewhere to spit...it's gross and i feel gross and tired and

iot feels like....when you need to burp. that precursor to burping. the air in your throat

but it won't come out

and it just sits there and burns

i have medicine for it, but i can't take it because i have an endoscopy tomorrow so i'm just tryin' to wing it

my brother needs to talk to me about selling dad's house and i just want to sleep

but i can't because i need to lie down to sleep and THAT'S JUST NOT HAPPENING

oh my god BIG FUCKING MOOD...

can you try sucking on ice cubes?

that helps me when im trying to get some fluids in me but at a not gulping rate LOL

yeah-- I have ice pops too...but i'm trying to eat something with substance because when i'm hungry the acid in my stomac is like "I'll just eat you instead!!" and....back to square one.

RIGHT RIGHT

YEAH... YEAH,

bread is always good for that, since it's a super base food and calms acids really well. just make sure it's like regular wheat bread not like pumpernickel or whatver

and remember that fruits are acidic because i fuck this up. too often,

yeah... >:C we're gonna live, my dude

WE GONNA LIVE, MY DUDE

babes......

please don't die

I'm just gonna pray for the gentle embrace of sleep tonight. pls. pls, body.

hey. hey Squish's body? chill. please.