shin --> sara shin and keiji both circling each other for being unreadable bastards
sara like you guys are the same
dogs barking at their own reflections
i do like that like. that 'you need something?' does speak to where their cr is at this point
shin --> sara shin just matrix bulleting the idea they're both traumatised people who care deep down
speaking of, note to self, get shin to dust the principal office doorknob
shin --> inaba realising the power i have to make shin just straight up be lying when i make a mistake like this
shin --> subaru me thinking about how subaru pushes things down and puts cheeriness on top and how shin's naturally inclined to see that as not caring at all, lies on floor
sighs sadly as i squeeze him like squeeky toy
fsdgdfsdgf that really is him
doing the 'does my character fuck' meme here bc i only have one and the answer is short but no, he doesn't
NOT NO, HE DOES NOT, MOVING ON
my fav answer thsu far i think
dsfdgfgdffdgfdf where's that one gif set
partly it's that me the person playing him, is ace as hell and kind of ??? about the whole thing but also like. he's got them intimacy/trust issues and low self esteem and depression which ain't helping
obh true that is so valid
yeah I feel like shin... gotta work on himself first tbh
yeah :'' ) he's got some things higher up on the priority list atm
hoo boy a lot happening today time to get cracking
fingers crossed for celtic cross it looks fun
i waffled on this bc hinata IS currently Ultimate Everything right now, but it's also just... canon, that Keiji, the closest yttd has to an ultimate detective, can't get a bead on him until sara opens up shin's heart
*bead on what he's feeling
yeah dr does translate on a lot of "because i said so" that i don't really feel translates to dwrp
it's kind of a compromise i feel
bc like... ranger's the same way where you gotta actively spend time with him to get a read on him
i think that's the best translation here honestly :' )
helps that hinata and shin haven't interacted much
i know i talked to nms about this and it was like well you gotta read the microexpressions and tone w/ the cards but sometimes he just does them randomly so gl
it's like if you spend enough time with him and pay attention to him you can so like shin's probably got a decent read on him by now, and komaeda can more or less tell, but with any cagey type you gotta spend time and care with 'em to really read them.
yisss
i do like that shin's got a fair bead on him and that goes both ways too with the both of them
shin's also like. vulnerable to his composure slipping or cracking and letting things through, even if it can get muddy if he means it or if he's lying, bc i get the feeling he's like
yeah i think it's really cool... tbh i love that despite the fact that he's not like midori, you can see a lot of where shin developed similar coping mechanisms in learning to close himself off quickly
bc if you don't and show that emotional weakness you get hurt
idk how to describe it but a lot of it isn't hiding his emotions so much as tucking them away or separating them from himself or channeling them to his advantage or just like. the same kind of mental self surgery in general
hhhhhh yeah it's very much developed coping mechanism in response to someone who is
very good at a) picking up on them and

picking at them
and it's interesting bc i think u can see that in shin ai as well, just taken a different route with it
(or the same route, displaced in time)
yeah hiding was the closest word i was pulling, but what you said is probably closer. it's very much about not letting those emotions show or control you because if you do - well, then it's kinda over
you almost have to be taking a step back and doing things from a distance... shin your mechanisms
exactly yeah... and i think that shows the same kind of brittleness shin has in general where like, it stands up well to increasing pressure/force and then will suddenly give
either due to an unexpected spike or it getting past a tipping
yeah.... the moment you show it.... you've lost, because you can't take that moment back
keep thinking also about how he's been starting to loosen in yogen and show more of himself as well... it's gonna hurt when midori arrives bc he's going to try and spool back a lot of growth
that's all for tonight i think
tomorrow stares at rantaro thread i'm coming for you
note to self DON'T FORGET THE FINGERPRINTS
i WILL get that done today this is a promise to myself
shin --> meeting this is where i'm glad i ooc have a good memory, when it's working right
ah fuck im really feeling the 'i have a post half written and then the thread moves on and i have to rewrite' stress atm
sorry lint
dsfdgfgd it's not your fault, the saransk thing is what prompted this and people aren't obligated to wait for me either
it's just one of those things
even with some of his trust in sara broken... he does still trust her in other respects
thinkin how midori will be sad he missed the wrench thrown in their relationship but its fine he can make up for lost time
he can throw a new wrench in it
a bigger, better, more destructive wrench
yall dont trust each other? wait let me help u
listen if they don't have the power of friendship they can at least have the power of hating midori
honestly hoping midori showing up does result in them putting aside their differences a bit
STPPP NOT USING HIM TO GET THEIR FRIENDSHIP BACK
thinkin how ill be vting at the same time so yall have the advantage as i get my footing, youll have a week until i know what i must do to destroy them
they can put aside there differences bc sara is going to be curled up in the corner like ;w

over joe
thinking about how clingy shes gonna be once she remembers him
there were like 2 ways to do it and we did the retraumatizing way
if she finds out ranger was the one who poisoned him im not legally liable for what she impulsively does
ranger's turn to almost get murdered
she's not gonna let joe out of her sight is she
stop ranger's not telling anyone
joe gets poisoned so much
theres a story about that sara its fine
we should take his blood out, clean it, then put it back in
im sending you all to the trenches and i dont expect any of you to return
we're just trying to clean up his blood is that so bad
adsfd ranger cheering in the background
next up on the urgent list.... saransk
okay, what next... probably tag outs and catching up on december threads, projects can be later
oh right and checking the meeting too
shin --> sara please let this be a normal field trip... in yogen? no way!
shin --> ranger i keep thinking about how many asunaro aphorisms shin picked up just hanging around midori
thinking about what social rank is shin joking around with you like this... sara had it for a while
im trying capn
we're gonna build them back up if it's the last thing i do
had the realising shin probably is going to be a bit more social for him after the return from the field trip, given how it ends for him
bc i do think he is an extrovert even if his withdrawn nature, trauma etc work against him there... he gets energy from other people
yogen has been like thawing, in this respect
keeping an eye on the saransk thread and looking for a good opportunity to bring up the sister thing
shin does get them in yogen when there isn't something supernatural making them happen, although usually not this bad
shin --> subaru laughing at the concept of shin just walking out quietly but it'd be a very short thread
shin --> subaru a REAL vengeance ghost who knows his sins would be calling him shin tsukimi
CRYING IS THAT HOW HE KNEW????? subarus gonna ask him how he knew hes been foiled!!! and i wouldve lauhged too i had a plan for it
sdfdgfsdfdg it's what lead him to properly listen, yeah
fdghgfsdgf sorry about your plan i'm curious now
he just would've followed shin to the hallway and spooked him through the hidden door
you can't escape your sins!!!!
dsfdgfghfgffd his sins have orange hair
aww shame.... they can do it together on someone else
she's going to punch through the drywall isn't she
subaru like this'll help them reconnect
pranks always worked for him
messing around means you're cool
so they'll stop being snippy and awkward
im crying
he says this and then there's the jojo 'we'll be right back' in the background
it's true tho shin does joke around a little if u get to that social rank
subaru got it early by virtue of eliciting vengeance
SEE??? MESSING AROUND DOES GET YOU PLACES

GET OUT OF MY DRYWALL?!?!?
sasara :3 wanna play a game
yes

ensive:
nooo that should be pensive
SHIfogjnkhsj nope ur

now
also thinking about how he will take charge sometimes; the escape attempt is the biggest example
shin --> subaru he's like that pic of the coiled snake going 'i ain't scare'
shin is soooo cute... i love him for his attempt honestly
:'''' ) its the stuck sliding door all over again
he really did and amami at least respected the effort. dw he won't tell anyone
i love that he's getting a crash course in first aid too, he'll be able to apply this next time
bc there's almost certainly going to be a next time im crying
the 'arisu kun first' also kills me
looks off mournfully this is NOT the outcome he had been looking for
but thats cute... shin's new practical skills i'm so proud
he's learning!
sfdg it's in the pile of things to do somewhere but i want to make a list of things/skills he knows/learnt at some point
im crying shin has decided you're not allowed to die amami
OH ME... amami's been picking up like a billion little hobbies he works on but i'm always like "what is he doing lately again?" a list is so smart... copying u

like this
hehehehe we can compare them like yu gi oh decks once we're done
he cares!
amami's become his friend and that means he's now ride or die for you
a tendency about himself he knows and fears a little, but he definitely is the sort to care fiercely
shin is so cute... so good.. i hope he knows ami cares abt him a lot too sighs
writes this down as a relationship to ruin yes yes i see
dsfdsdfd it needs to get through his thick layer of self esteem issues but he is sensing it
im crying after 'someone is friendly to me, what are they after' the next layer is 'someone likes me...........why???'
sdfdgdf midori @ amami like 'that's mine, you know'
IM CRYING please give him a shin ai to placate him
SLKJDF MIDORI LIKE OH? SHIN HAS FRIENDS? NOT FOR LONG
something to knaw on like a ham hock
DSFDGFs YEAH
me circling shin like a shark tho purrhaps another thread once the results on this one are wrapped... if u aren't overloaded already :3c
midori ticking off all the boxes in the abuser handbook and humming while he checks off 'isolating from friends and family'
ugh gotta make a new one in yogen
dsfdgfdf i have... maybe a lot going on looks at 40+ inbox but yisss i do want thread if you don't mind it being slow
he's gotta make a new list of shin's friendships to break

him humming
how did shin even get one this long his little meow meow's gotten way too social
ITS LIKE SANTAS NAUGHTY NICE LIST LONG
HE'S GOT TO ROLL UP HIS SLEEVES YOU'RE MAKING HIM DO HARD WORK SHIN
but its so cute they took care of his meow meow sighs cant have him be too complacent
its ok sou hes here to fix you
god, thinking about that one fic where is it
UGH THINKIN HOW HIS MEOW MEOW NEVER LETS HIS OWNER REST
link me it i have to know now!!!
YESSS idm if it's a little slow!! plus we can wait 'til you feel ready to taper off on this current one too if that helps

just hit me in disc whenever you'd feel up for it purrhaps!
here you go!
im crying yttd fics are either bad, 'eh', or utterly amazing crack
there's one about keiji going to home depot i still think about
and one about an extremely tense game of spin the bottle
he's at your job, he's touching the saws
i'll get you that one too hang on
how imma judge it from home depot eyes
also
kagehira that sounds like a plan! : D

yessss okay sounds good!!
`“Hold tight baby.” Keiji said in Japanese, despite this being America. “Daddy’s coming back soon.”`
IM IN TEARS I NEED A FEWEW MINUTES
IT CAME AT ME TOO FAST I DIDNT EXPECT IT
which life did this happen in i think
if past shin kept removing his tallies
the police came to yogen exclusively for this
FOR HIS 8 CASES OF MANSLAUGHTER AND ARSON AND ILLEGAL SUBSTANCE POSSESSION
sighs he did that scan barcode on twitter that had photoshop and the entirety of some anime
hiyori couldnt live that life of crime that didnt belong to him
despite they prob watched it after shin torrented it
he absolutely is going to go for taking the gun and removing the bullets at the first opportunity but right now things are a bit Busy
amami failed his gun safety course he's having his weapon confiscated now
dfgdfsdfdg failed rule of don't point at something you don't want to kill
THATS THE VERY FIRST RULE NO LESS.......
crying why are all his friends bad at gun safety
it's a deleted scene but I think about this a lot
also re: the height and name meaning memes
shin's 5'6'' i.e. 168cm and justttt past the window of bone plate closure so unlikely to grow any more, which is a shame because not eating well for three years probably didn't help
the username meaning is the name of his theme song Not So, Sou, in English, which has some fun dual meanings. It's also Anxiety, The Song.
in Japanese it's Uso, Sou, which is (It's/that's/a) Lie, Sou
anyway i'm realising it's fun for emotion route shin in particular bc, well, he's a little less sou
he was a little too 'dwbi' this tag, but.... shin's dwbi in general sometimes
I read rantaro as ranmaru and did a double take so hard I gave myself whiplash LOL
still crying at sara going 'you wouldn't get along' about shin and ranmaru and shin going '???'
shin would smell a yandere on sight
does he like the aroma is that why he stayed with midori as long as he did
sfdgfhhfgd midori is why he knows the aroma at all
turns out, he does not
i still love his little 'why don't you want miss sara to have hope?' snip at ranmaru so much
it's interesting bc shin's instincts are telling him sara and ranmaru's cr has toxic vibes but it's going a little haywire bc the power differential is all over the place
i love how suspicious this could make shin look; he has the gun, and he absolutely could have been caught being covered in blood or washing it out
voting for him earnt alice a ton of points with shin :' )
also i accidentally pressed mark all as read
so
there go 40 posts, but also there go 40 posts crying
i'll go back an pick through but do let me know if you want to continue a thread
I think we only had the Christmas thread / gacha thread... I think
but we could do sumn new at Disney if u wanted
lemme get my house in order and then i'll tag out bc even without tags there's some organizational stuff i wanted to do
crying bc if he finds out they did smth to haruka his cooperativity meter will go down like stonks
me thinkin how it aint there fault, but the fault of one of his yearmates
subaru made her a shrine and with natsume taking on the big bro role the remembrance factor is letting haruka move on
BUT NEITHER OF THEM ARE THERE TO SAY SO subaru got told straight out by her she could move on now
ohhhh no
he has no idea and i love that honestly
ILL BET LUKA DONT KNOW EITHER
shin's original goal for going to saransk was to find out who wanted to speak to a 'haru-' before getting cut off and if they knew haruka and then relay any message back to her im crying
god there is a lot going on
shin --> ishimaru thinking about that one art about shin and alice being gossips and every time shin takes the opportunity to slander komaeda
the ainami, i should clarify
and with that that's all january's threads either at 5 or waiting on responses (apart from the rika fingerprint one i'm kind of stuck on) so time to start working on toplevels etc
shins so adorable i love him
he iiiiis i love when he gets to be excited about things and show them off to people without fear of judgement
(in this case bc it's clear nanami is also a gacha fan)
not knowing that's her npc self responsible
he really wishes he could have saved haruka : <
he came here so that he could tell her anything he found out
NOOOOOOO IMMA BE SAD STOPPP my scrunmnkly bro
its so awk bc komaeda is standing right there
and he sees shin asking that q and gettuing that answer
dont hurt his ex bestie like this luka
IKR it hurts me so much
esp since he doesn't know that like, thanks to natsume et al she's ready to move on :' )
i hate it i think komaeda would suggest that shin talks to haruka more often while he has the chance
can't let those moments slip away bc they dont know WHEN she'll up and disappear
tbf while he's been not doing it as much due to the cold weather, he does habitually hang out with haruka in the library
i've just been handwaving it bc dsfdgf npc contact scares me
he has an adderstone now too : D
NOOO im crying thats right i forgot u said shin hangs out in the library bc komaeda lives there too NOOO THAT MAIKES ME EXTRA SAD BC THEN HE'D SEE SHIN TALKIN TO HER OR SUMN
sad luka went for the heart
HE PROBABLY HAS YEAH :' ) talking to haruka, studying with Helena, or just reading... up until now he hasn't been able to see/hear her so it's mostly keeping her company and reading aloud to the nearby cold spot
dsfdgffdfd she did i'm just like
ori really good at going for the heart as well
HATE HE KNOWS SHINS LIBRARY SCHEDULE bc komaeda gets to work part time in there w the librarian im crying BUT NOOO IM SO SAD sits down and prays abt it... need to pray im sad
dsfdgfgfd i love that, it means shin has to talk to him when he wants to check out books
sits down and prays wit u
IM CRYING THATS SO FUNNY i hope komaeda slides him an extra book hes already read bc he thought it was good or sumn, he thinks shin might like it, then it has like a note in it that says hi
same not ori putting us in church hours
when we pray to the shrine its over
fdgfhhgfhgffd shin's eclectic book reports
i hope that by next new years they can pray at the shrine
what kind of things does komaeda like to read so i know what he's been slipping shin
let me go check sumn bc i think komaedas dr card is based off some book
id give shin that one JUST bc of the connection but komaedas an avid reader, he lit says his luck doesnt work in the library so its a safe place to him so he prob reads every type of book but lemme get some exampless
what languages can shin read
bc komaeda can read jpn, russian, english, latin... there was another... gotta ask yama
bc im crying at the thought of giving shin a latin book

it was a POEM i hated reading it bc i could see the komaedaness init
komaeda prob reads agatha christie, confessions by kanae minato, human chair by edogawa ranpo. so mystery, true crime, biographies, amami got him into reading atlas and books abt the world bc he realized komaeda was being stressed out in the school bc he has stagnant boring things, great gatsby... lotr...
looks up id have to find a book rng and be like "so thats the book of the day"
do you need me to dump my pretentious reading list on you
A LIST BUT IDK WHERE IT WENT
shin can read japanese and a little braille... everything else has to go through yogen's translation filter and is harder for him
he probably knows some scattered english words but isn't fluent
im crying. give him the latin book komaeda
aw... ok i think komaeda can give him english books and a latin (eng to help him learn it better) and latin is just something to throw him offbut if shin learns a few latin phrases thats good enough im crying
also yesssss fellow agatha christie fan, i went nuts for her books in high school
god
his journey to becoming daniil dankovsky is starting
YES AGATHA CHRISTIES STUFF IS SOOO GOOD i had to reread one bc rina reminded me and i was like god yeah komaeda would love this work of art akjhddskhj
SHE JUST HIT IT OUT OF THE PARK SO CONSISTENTLY <3
i love this tho giving him mystery and crime books maybe they're behind his current fingerprinting craze who knows
PLEASE IM SO HAPPY FOR SHIN the library is a good place i hope he tells komaeda his thoughts and uses some english or latin when talking to him bc komaedas fluent he can talk it back and then shin gets confused or sumn
THATS SOOOO CUTE PLEASE lets make that canon
komaeda teaching the yttds how to detective in his own different ways i love it so much
sara needing hands on, shin is a nerd so books are better bc hes in the library... im sobbing his yttds growing up to be detectives
dsfdfgdfdg i think shin's used to parsing english through the filter since he chats with helena so much
latin is, however, mean and i love it
they are...... they grow up so fast
im so glad cant wait to tag shin one day and use some latin on him
im crying i think if shin did like komaeda more he'd try learn english and latin proper on his own time to impress him later, bc one of his love languages is trying to pick up his friend's interests, skills etc (which, crying, it made things easier for midori too), unfortunately......
crying thinking about npc shin doing this tho :'''' )
thinking about where shin probably does know like four languages and it
's programming... hinoki, python and some two or three others i need to decide on
thats sooo cute im crying its ok shin will like komaeda one day today might not be it but slow exposure. its the small things if he DID speak sumn he heard from the book komaeda will just guess he liked it more than doing it bc shin knows komaedas capable
he has low self esteem so in the end hes glad shin likes the book but aw... npc shin im crying he would have known all the languages bc he prob switched up every day
fdgfhfgfdgfhgfd komaeda playing the long game of wearing him down except that's rubbing shin the wrong way so it kind of stays neutral
their cr has slowly changed over time, though, like shin is actually more honest with komaeda, even if that honesty is mostly expressed as >: |
fdgfhgdf it's always possible for it to be just a good book that shin picks things up from and he's like this doesn't mean anything don't read into it
but awww i love that so much
them spending a day speaking russian and shin stumbling a little and going for the easy stuff but they're talking in it
i love how yogen makes like that 'speak only the language you're learning for a day' challenge easier too bc people can still understand you so you don't need to switch
tbh i wouldnt even say hes wearing him down, its more like komaeda just does what komaeda wants. he bothers who he wants bc hes kinda entilted, so if he sees shin, he'll mess w him, but thats mostly bc of their past memories. no one really deals w him so shin had the patience so he can talk to him w/o issues.
AND YEAH thats what komaeda would see it as, even if they were good friends bc of shins love language, komaeda would ALWAYS believe its a good book be he likes books so hes like "oh hes the same way, i agree" you pick sumn up from the book bc u enjoyed it
im crying i remember bc we have so many charas so the language barrier was attacking everyone its so cute tho i love it
:'''' ) i love it honestly like they were friends so as far as komaeda's concerned shin's his now
i love that tho like it's so cute of komaeda he wouldn't give shin a book he didn't think was good and i love him picking up when shin enjoyed or learnt something from it
dsfdgfdfs yeah shin's kind of spoiled by so many people speaking japanese or english which he's gotten used to
im crying it goes from oh, shin likes this book to komaeda finding something like it but a little harder on the reading level. some symbolism and philosophy and its korean or sumn IM TEARING UP, but he'll slip him a normal book in there he can read with ease. and its funny bc im sure if its sumn shin liked... komaeda prob genuinely likes too
its fine guys theyre just conversing through text of classics
thikning about the day where shin is like .........are there more like this and komaeda's like : D and he's like NO
IM CRYING STOPPP!!!!! what type of librarian would he be
it also helps he's friends with helena so they're both getting him into various literatures
also i think abt how its rare to find certain books in the library
so komaeda probably uses his luck for shin depending on what hes looking for
thinking about how midori wrote poems about shin's face it's okay shin we'll get you some not-creepy poetry
awwwww i love that so much
so shin can say he has NEVER seen this book before ever and komaeda just like oh ur lucky!!
PLEASE MIDORIS POETRY, a wordsmith of his time
that's cute as hell i love it
like hiding something for a kid and then being : O!!! wow!! when they find it
honestly i do headcanon that midori's poetry is good it's just also deeply concerning in subject matter
but crying shin actually has mentioned he had a friend who was 'into that stuff' re poetry to helena which is.... i think the most he's mentioned midori ever in yogen expect to people who don't already know
nms!
3 years ago @Edit 3 years ago
YEAH I DO TOO i think he prob cutesified it too to just be funny he has counselor teas like i do this bc its funny
CRYING HOW MIDORI GUNNA POP UP MORE OFTEN IN SHINS VOCAUBLARY
dsfdgfhgdfsdfdgf komaeda is just vibin, doing things for fun sdfdgfgdf he's stuck orange construction paper hearts inside
dsfdgdf yeah god.
i think like. he has started to process him a bit more while here bc like, the process didn't stop at three years
he got to throw darts at the painting and laugh at how ridiculous midori kind of was when he's not there to make it scary, and that sort of thing, even if he never got that logic memory
one day he will, it's on my wishlist, but still
how shin can soon throw the dart in midoris eye fr and he just takes it out the glow up
NOT HIS LOGIC MEMORY SIGH looks up me
my lil stressed out scrunkly
fdgfgdfgfhgdf honestly i strongly can see sara doing that
it's interesting bc he's like 'i don't want to remember some things it won't help' and then someone asks if it's better to forget things and he hisses
midori arriving might be the impetus bc if there's things he doesn't know he's at a disadvantage whereas so far in yogen it's like. not been vital
god shin please forget midori dont let this man ruin your life anymore
he's been moving on! even more than he already had, slowly but surely :' )
and i think not wanting to know is a sign of that in some ways
even as it's also a sign of that tension between shin's curiosity and shin's not wanting to touch things that are just baseline in him
keep thinking about how like. after sara strangled him he asked ranger how many times she killed him in simulations and also how kanna died
in a picking at the wound way and it's a good thing ranger shut him down
im crying rangers good at that sighs bc shin didnt need that answer im crying
ranger was so good i love him so much
oh gosh yeah, shin really didn't need to know that... it hurt me a lot when he asked that.
it really is like you know you shouldn't, but you're already wounded so you want to see how much worse you can make it.
yeah :''' ) yeah it's just. it hurts me so much
touching the rotten tooth with your tongue almost
ranger really did help so much he was kind of like the ambulance at the bottom of the cliff with the net there
shin --> saransk i love when the timing works out, what with the adderstone acquisition
romantic stage of the rp is that shin might be adding a tiny crush on alice next on the shelf to the tiny crush on sidney, both of which he will be doing nothing about im crying
again for both the ooc and ic reasons
dfdgf man accusing someone really does destroy your inbox
crying how did i sleep in til 3pm okay time to get things done
shin --> keebo the shine hasn't worn off realising he's in a sci fi universe
i'm also eyes emoji at that ranmaru
do u want the links enh posted at
its on bakerstreet but still
he likes rollercoasters now
thinking about how I'm gonna do this and I'll think I'll make a catchall post for all the running around shin is going to be doing about this
wraps shin in an emotional burrio
I'M CRYING i'm so sorry shin
dsfdgsfd shin's no good very terrible horrible valentine's day?
that wasn't supposed to have a question mark
i'll make a 'what are we going to do about midori' meeting part of the post too for tidiness
no ranger still has his head
dsfdfdg ranger is invited but only if he leaves midori in the pool again or smth
Stop that's midoris cute otouto
what if he puts him in a box and puts a heavy object on it so he's stuck
he could still hear them though
and make comments from inside the box
dsfdsd while you're here nms what time of day is all this happening?
we'll put the box in the basement
dsfdgfdff
box in the cold fire room
as for time... uhmmmmmmmmm I think since vday is monday, it might be around after a class or sumn or maybe lunch what would work w u bunny
yeah that works out nicely then : D
i'll get some toplevels up for rantaro and helena and maybe sara and alice first i'm going to eat tho
he'd probably text nene as well but i know amity is Going Through It so this is a note to self to ask if she'd like to handwave smth or no
shin going around like the fire brigade knocking on people's doors
is this an overreaction? yes, but also kind of no
very much no i think
it's interesting bc i don't think he'd have done this when first in yogen
dsfdsdfdg yeah
considering it's midori......
hes rallying like the army I'm in tears and midori is just 🧍♂️
he's just standing there
MENACINGLY
im crying shin is in full smacking his own ai with a stick mode
it's cute and sad and understandable
shin --> meeting the horror of realising you miss the utterly terrible situation you were in because at least it had clear rules
shin --> inaba this is cute, he actually is feeling just a little better
thinking about how he's probably going to try and warn subaru and kaede through rantaro
shin --> nanami helena has laid a lot of groundwork here but also nanami is NOT helena
he's inclined to be inclined towards her but their CR is just starting out and he's cautious as a default
it does mean he's a little less snappy or shut-down-y about it than he might be though
shin --> rantaro shin's taking a much different tack here than I thought he would and it's interesting
shin --> alice + sara shin hitting the point of feeling cornered where he starts looking at the sacrifice card
i kept thinking about shin ai during that One Bit while writing this
"let me think" NOOO HIM AND MIDORI NEED TO THINK
THEY DOOO they need their prep time :' )
shin --> helena thinking about that 'until he says it's alright she's still upset with sara' and going
when you're ready to throw hands
little a stick smack
it kills meeee bc like
since it was apparent at the meeting he knows helena isn't fond of sara right now but it'll take a bit to emotionally click that's bc of him
shin --> rantaro this whole direction is somewhere i didn't expect shin to go but i'm putting popcorn in my mouth
im crying i don't know if we decided the meeting was on the 13th or the 15th but i find it very funny if 'tried to kill me four times' is placed in this context
rantaro likes us bc we crazy
it's true
he can sense it, like a weathervane
I think that's so cute gotta put it in the context of tried to kill me 4 times now
me also shoving popcorn in my mouth
yissssss
im crying in the corner bc shin still doesn't know about the drs deathgames
only about the idvs
just like 'oh by the way death games are real'
and only one side of things too 8')
yeah :''' ) he doesn't know about helena's side of it
NOT HOW SHIN DOESNT KNOW THE DR DEATH GAMES
its bc drs live every day like its a death game
they really sit down thinkin how can they kill a person if they have only a pot and a pan and then theyre like if i had some invisible string to wrap around a chair i could kill the person who sits there by pulling it and the chair slipping out from under them so their head hit the table but then u whack them w the pot so they fall on the floor
FDGFDGGDFSDF YEAH HONESTLY
who comes up with that in like three days i would believe they'd all thought about it but never acted on it
it's like how you see a tall building and think about how you would climb it but you never do and then one day you're in 'Climb Tall Building Or Die', the event
God yeah and when you have your window open when driving in a car over the bridge and you think about throwing it and imagine what that'd be like
sfdgfs like throwing rubbish out?
when you're in a car and u have your phone you never imagine throwing it out the window just bc its that crazy part of your brain at work
like you know not to but WHAT IF!!!
OH yeah exactly that sort of thing
dfdgfd brain is like 'what if this' and you're like '......thanks' and put the dead mouse in the bin
going for bike ride but when i'm back
eyes emoji at the meme
im loving his moment so much
shin mentally kin assigning alice as bard
okay gathering my thoughts here bc there's a lot going on
I think I'm going to sit shin out of this investigation, at least for now, because there's already A Lot happening

we can be in the corner
I might chime in when things cool down bc he does have IC reason to get involved but for now he's either blissfully unaware in the school building or getting helena some comfort soup later
shin takes a nap (for a week or so)
february has been Stress Month "weren't the other months also Stress Months" november was okay
February especially tho LOL
yeah :''' ) dying of starvation and also murder mysteries and midori arriving....
the tag, i mean, not the feeling lightheaded
im crying i love that this shin has never seen her
he no longer cares if ranger plays stupid games and wins stupid prizes as far as he's concerned :' )
just if it gets the rest of them stupid prizes too
and hhhh kills me bc yeah he thinks alice is the best choice here bc he knows that sara killed midori but he clearly fucked with her and it was only possible because of something that's gone now
even after the divorce, he doesn't want midori to happen to her
it's so funny bc ranger is the one person that midori wouldn't really target
so in return ranger has some level of influence over midori so i'm kinda crying... sorry for everything after this shin
sfdgffs i knowwwww it kills me bc shin is picking up on this but his takeaway is like well SOME OF US can't do that im crying these poor kids
there's that resentment of like
someone who hurt you and you see them interacting prefectly fine with someone else and you're like i wanted that
so there's almost like that element of 'i hope it does go wrong for you, and then you'll see i'm right' and i'm like oh shin
when it comes down to it he doesn't actually... want people to suffer if he can help it, but he isn't immune to very human thoughts either
if he was thinking clearly he could see that ranger having this influence is good for them like as ranger says, they can use it, and he's basically offering
it's just........ all that
i just keep thinking about that bit, where is it
keep thinking about how this is his last words
yeah, i'm so sad for everyone here bc i emphasize with shin so much, and i think i'd respond the same way if i were in his place.. bc you can understand things logically and not be able to separate the emotion from them. i'm sure that he logically understands that ranger can handle midori bc they're from the same toxic cesspit,
and that's not a positive thing in any way... but you know, you use what you got, but emotionally it's just picking at an already open wound and it translates into hurt and feelings of inadequacy.
yeah... god i think about that line so much, that really hurts me.
i feel bad for both of them bc i know there's just hurt feelings on both sides ughh
im just
lying on the floor about both of them so much right now
it really is a reopened wound pouring out on the floor
crying that one 'i've got hurt feelings' song is playing in my head rn
yeah it's one of those things where it really is just
two people's very different traumas smacking into each other
i do love how it took him a month to return clamor's monocle but the instant he comes back to yogen he's like I ABANDONED MY GIRL
i feel bad for handwaving so much of their cr but i'm happy i'm getting to give her a sendoff if that's what ends up happening
SAME it really is just what you said.. it'll be okay though sometimes u need a lil hurt, i believe in them to be okay
sometimes u don't know there's a problem between you until smth like this happens and then you can try and fix it
like the tarot tower card
YEAH it really is like that
they probably will be okay in the end...... shin is a bit of an impulsive and kneejerk boi but it does mean given time to cool down he... does cool down
actually able to think it through at some point probably
part of the tragedy of the death game really, he's not given any chance to return to baseline bc just when it's getting a little too chummy in here something happens to jack up his paranoia/distrust/dislike again
yeah, that's what i think... i think it's impossible to think clearly when you're processing trauma, and honestly this was just the wrong time to have that conversation (on ranger's end.) but i think if you give him a little time he can reason things out.
it really is... the death game is just snapping your fingers and you're onto the next part, and so his anxiety is just constantly being spiked. and then i think characters like keiji who don't necessarily mean to do rub up against him wrong, so there's just never true breathing room.
it's just one massive pressure cooker by design
adding on top of that how little people are probably sleeping and eating
and hhh yeah
shin basically panicked and jumped to this in a state where he was still midway through the loading bar and it's just... ouugh it's bad timing in general
he's smart but trauma doesn't care about smart
and ohoh? what's happening on ranger's end?
i do have a clearer idea of where he went in saransk now tho
oof had my booster yesterday and I'm feeling it mr krabs
it's weirdly pleasant, but that might be because mild aches do that to me
comes back in here... trauma really does not care. for ranger tho, he's sensitive to rejection and behavioral changes, but i think it also stings coming from shin and sara in particular bc he has and would go out of his way for him in a way he hasn't and won't anyone else. i was telling nms that like komaeda's a the top of the list but ranger -
- doesn't do much for him in that he'll deck someone for him, but komaeda can handle komaeda and he expects that. and if you can't protect yourself, too bad. but i think he's made an effort there (such as him telling ko to back off of sara, and i think he probably elbowed him abou shin after realizing how bad off he was.)
so it's like this thing that he doesn't DO for anyone and i think he feels burned and hissy about it, and frustrated bc i think there's this self defense of "okay you want bad things happen, but you won't do it youself, and you're rejecting everything i say."
and that's not really what shin's trying to do and it's just coping, but ranger doesn't process things in a healthy way either so i think he just feels burned bc... i think he really does care so it's like with ko on nye where you gotta learn to process being hurt and conflict by, well, experiencing it.
and then i do think there's a little bit of "okay, but MIDORI is just fine with me, so why aren't you" which is really unfair but emotions aren't logical cries.
THEY REALLY AREN'T IM CRYING god poor ranger poor both with them
to him it really is like trying to help a stuck dog and it bites you
i also love how they're mutually like 'you don't GET midori' because they've had different experiences of him, it's like the blind men and the elephant
and it kills me bc shin's naturally inclined to be very defensive on that because his thoughts on it have been gaslit on that so much before he can't allow himself to doubt
god, ranger elbowing komaeda about shin i love him
working on ac currently but'll finish that up and then get stuck into tags tomorrow
amazing how much a bike ride restores HP
bonus ac this one is the actual bonus ac instead of permanent ac whoops
this month's theme: haruka and keigo
next one's... who knows : D
i knowww i love how that worked out
dsfdgf the cheese was moldy but i've got other food so i'm happy
i just like enshrining things as double canon
oh i love the updated locations
THEY DO ori did a good job
crying at the ref to shin finding the infinite food hack
shin --> alice adds 'fundraising for more computers?' to march maybe list
"we fundraised for dorms" more like we bullied the rich kids into doing it
making fingers rubbing gestures at komaeda and everything
he's been >: V around corners but vanishing before he can be pinned down
NOT IT WAS A GOOD PLAN AT THE TIME
he was under quite a lot of pressure miss sara..............
people with green hair just has amnesia problems.....damn................................its not their fault!!
looks at sahalin yeah that scans
kanna the only one who cant do it
rescue her from green hairdom
hey ron hey billy but it's hey sara fuck you midori
IM CRYING HE IS im so happy about him
the way his meow meow embarrasses him even now
despite everything, you are still shin tsukimi
slightly cringe but we love him anyway
STOPPP hes a cute cringe WHO did he learn from if not the biggest cringe of all
dsfdgfgdf IT'S TRUE the og cringe was his mentor
I KNOW
beautiful moment
WHY ARE YOU AT THE DEVIL'S SACRAMENT
THIS THREAD IS A GIFT HONESTLY
`and rolling off the side of the table and coincidentally and 'accidentally' elbowing Midori's cup onto his shoes as he does so.]`
SUMN about that makes me cry
raise the stakes Splenda > tea > his life
it kills me bc this thread is funny as hell but also :' ) bc in a lot of ways shin is trying to do that thing where it's like a duck will make it's wing look broken to lead away predators
or how an older sibling might try to get an abusive parent to take their attention off a sibling and onto them
but also he genuinely does want to ruin midori's shoes
he really is trying it huh I respect that getting midoris attention is hard
it iiiis
fdgf he's trying his best :' )
shin --> ainami how did i forget this thread... since i'm a day ahead it might squeak through