the blend of affection and derisive insults about her being a pathetic and helpless baby is a perfect mix for her relationship to victimhood and helplessness.
"take a good look this is me, this is what i shouldn't be, this is what i wanna be!" is my planned arc tragectory, unraveling a mysterious culprit out of fragmented memories and coming to the startling and horrifying conclusion that the one she's looking for is herself.
it's what her playlist is named after lol. the blend of knowing that she's a horrific person and knowing that she's never going to face any consequences for that and that mixture of self hatred and a palpable god complex is 90% of the reason she's Like That.
I'll go for it
A pure violation of God's great creation
It's an infestation, it's world domination
I never come second place, always been a big disgrace
Smell the fear I know you see, high achiever (Yeah, that's me)
Make you mad ruining your shit, trust me I'm not hesitant
Killing so I stay on top but I could never do no wrong
(aelwyn lyrics)
he's surprisingly hard to find songs for tbh, and i have like six playlists for him that i've been making since like, 2016.
this song gets associated with jason a lot but tbh i think it's more about generational trauma and the sins of the father, which is much less jason's relationship with bruce and much more damian's relationship with both his parents.
You're born into this life paying
For the sins of somebody else's past
Well daddy worked his whole life for nothing but the pain
Now he walks these empty rooms looking for something to blame
But you inherit the sins, you inherit the flames
gimme a misty and lottie tune
I'm putting you out of your misery
'Cause darling you're dragging me down
I wish I could say that I'm sorry
But I'm over that, now I'm taking you out
It's a cruel, cruel world
I used to see beauty in people
But now I see muscle and bones
You know I never wanted to hurt you
But I'm sorry, my friend, this is the end
it's about the complete loss of hope, the desire to shed any ambition of possibly being anything other than a heartless demon, and callously abandoning the people they were fighting for in the first place in the process of hardening their heart and allowing themselves to destroy the world they once gave their life to save.
actually none of them have canon themes lmao i just realized
I'm learning to live
I'm trying to be better
I'm learning to give
But I don't know if I'm a giver
I don't know if I'm a giver
specifically faith struggling with redemption and being a hero without buffy there, mimicking her in a world that doesn't really operate in the way that she's used to (it's not that far off though lol, sunnydale is a nightmare)
moonlanding:
IAMX - BernadetteYou and me in our playhouse
Living in a veil
We never need to go without
Memories bring no joy or peace
We are alone
And all we need
Tuning out of the poison
Every waking day
Intolerance to overcome
Fortunes won by the boys with the guns
We are alone Nowhere to run
"Noone wanted to play with me as a kid
So I've been scheming like a criminal ever since
To make them love me and make it seem effortless
This is the first time I've felt the need to confess
And I swear I'm only cryptic and machievellian 'cuz I care."
nothing else needed i just realized i never did misty