I was talking with a coworker over Teams and she commented on one of my work processes and that just set me off. I know she just meant to make a suggestion for the future but at the moment I just thought "I can't work this job anymore"

and I spent the whole day crying on and off, feeling so overwhelmed I couldn't churn any more of my reports, read any of my emails or do any of the analysis I was supposed to do

I need to find therapy. I keep saying it and I keep putting it off but if I continue like this my job is going to be in danger lol

I think for a while my problems have been getting too much to be sharing with friends and I really need to find someone better qualified for this sort of thing

I found a place that offers video/audio as opposed to face-to-face and I could manage that for a start. The problem is I live with my parents and sibling and I HAVE NO PRIVACY, grgh

I also wrote down my immediate problems to start with and while doing so I suspected that I've had work-related burnout and depression from as far back as 2017. It got better for a bit and then it worsened again in 2022-2023. I agreed to a promotion in 2024 thinking it'd get me out of my funk but it turned out to be a huge misstep

I had basically one or two weeks in Sep where I'd be so overwhelmed by work that I'm basically paralysed and can't do anything. Looking back now that should have been my wakeup call. But I guess coming back after an extended break and still having the same problem was what made me realise the seriousness

I probably won't be working this job for longer too. I'll keep it because I need the money. Company's financials will only be finalised in May, then after that, I don't know

I know this is the worst economy to quit without a job but I don't want to be bringing all this baggage with me to the next one...

I'm frustrated because I had this opportunity and yesterday I was shared one more opportunity and I can't make use of either because of all these