friends. I am struggling. to the point that I want to give you all permission to move forward without me in RP however you see fit. we have played together long enough you know what you can do. I trust you all.
if there's anything I can do, let me know
No need for all that for me, I too haven't done much in months. This tour has been kicking my ass. I am here for any RP you feel like whenever you're back. No rush and no feeling bad about it.
We're here if you want to talk about it.
its a lot. mostly work. 22 business days until go live on the biggest, most impactful project I have ever worked on.
also my employees who has battling cancer while doing this shit show project just told me yesterday she is going to retire. treatment didn't work. she has months to live.
WHAT THE FUCK CAN I DO TO HELP HER????
age has worked her ass off for me for the last 2 years while fighting cancer. she won't be here to see her hard work go live. or see her daughter graduate med school. I am heart broken.
I can't be bothered to correct typos. my eyes are killing me. too much smoke from fires plus nasty eyeballs meds so I dont go blind = blurry vision.
im getting up at 4am everyday. working until 10. this. is. so. hard.
That is so much. Just the work would be crushing, but your coworker, too, that's horrible
it really is, I'm sorry. I know that's not enough but damn that's just so much, I'm am sorry
I don't know the relationship you have with your coworker, but if it's one where a big retirement party/occasion for everyone to express their appreciation of her is appropriate, now is the time.
work aside. I just wish I could do literally anything to help Tami. and I can't. there is nothing to do but support her as age goes through this heartbreaking transition of life to death.
im planning her a big party!
gonna go to lunch just me and her tomorrow. I started a venmo thing at work so we can get her like a ton of doordash so she doesn't have to think about cooking dinners.
Don't forget her. Having worked with people at the nursing home on hospice care, it's hard, but they get lonely. Visiting when you can is helpful just to keep their spirits up, especially when they get to a point they can't leave the house.
that just made me tear up. and I will. thank you for saying that. I have seen people get forgotten about as their disease progresses. I won't forget her. I'll make sure of it.
it feels so selfish to feel how I feel but im just so fucking sad and so damn stressed at the same time.
It's hard as fuck, especially when you're already stressed
^all of that
the other thing you can do for her (at some later point when she's closer to the end) is let her know you'll check in on her daughter too. b/c she'll worry about that
oh shit that is profound. I never would have thought of that. because im crying again. that is a wonderful idea
yeah what AdrienGriffon and butterflied said
A card, a phone call, an offer to help her record a message for her daughter's future milestones while she's able (or to get said recordings to her daughter after she's gone)
That’s too much. I know you got a lot on and responsibility’s but no one is going to take care of you but you. Everyone else will make demands of your time but your health, headspace and time to recharge are essential. I don’t love this.
I really hope that after this project is done and dusted you’re not suddenly tasked with another one because you have done so well on this one. 🫤
And I’m so sorry to hear about your Sage (I believe that her name?). Everyone had a lot of great ideas on how to celebrate her. And anticipatory grief is such a demon so make sure you talk to someone (or one of us!) when you need to.
💕💕💕💕💕💕
^that, too
yes that too
/hugs That’s a lot. Please know that everyone here loves and supports you.
Also Selene is now married to Deadpool.
This is so much, Chelle. I'm furious that you're having to work such a demanding schedule while all of this is going on.
Just now seeing this this, Im so sorry you're going through something so heavy while work is so stupidly demanding and stressful 😩 the absolute last thing you should worry about is rp. We're your friends, we're never not here. It'll still be around whenever you're ready.
/all the hugs/ we love you
one day the stress won't be as bad. after we go live ill shift into the 'optimization' part of this project. getting to all the stuff I couldn't get done for my clinical programs before 9/6. its a very big list. but it won't be this pace.
the next 2 weeks super suck. last 2 weeks of clinical dress rehearsals. we go to clinics everyday and have them practice. we also do device connectivity checks and a bunch of other shit. its 4am - 10pm days. im already tired.
have some funny. Bea gave nick a black eye.
I also met up with Tami for lunch just the 2 of us so we could talk in person about her health and plans for retirement.
I also have to scour resumes, do interviews to replace Tami and then on board someone while I am traveling for 2 weeks. ugh. I wonder if I could pawn that off on my project manager.
that's a lot
in more entertaining news. Bea gave nick a black eye. this is like a few days old....so you dont get to see the full glory of the damage she did. his cheek was really swollen. 
and how did Bea manage to nail him?
they were playing tug of war and she's a cheater and hit him in the face
lmao
that's more of a Sophia Petrillo thing to do
okay but that's a completely unreasonable work schedule, salary or not.
it is a super shitty schedule. but, I need the clinics to not have patients in them when we do this. so we do the stuff in the actual clinics betwee. 5am-8am, 11-1, 5-8pm. the alternative is that i ask them to cancel their patients for the day. all my clinics are Specialties....ppl may be waiting months to get in. soooo....I gotta be tired.
its ok though. this shit won't last forever. its just temporary.
just your resident Golden Girls expert, nbd
I took time today to not stress about work, and I started on my halloween costume. gonna do a punk snow white. I also went to a rave last night with my neices. so, I feel more human after doing things for me.
butterflied: we probably should have named her Sophia with the attitude she has.
lmao
I love it
Yes, you can delegate that to your project manager!!