[Sensory] Just got woken up from a dead NyQuil sleep on the couch in the living room by a near-inaudible crunch snuffle crunch noise. Spent ten minutes trying to figure out where tf it’s coming from.
Him: “Just got back.” [Has a cut on his cheek.] “You know how arrests go down after lunch? So like - if you’re going to commit a crime, do it after lunch. “ Me: “Ooh. Good to know. >.>” Me: “So uh. Cafe au lait, large, four Splenda.”